I am getting married. Words I never thought I would type or even say out loud. I’m getting married in like two weeks or so. No exact date has been picked, a dress hasn’t been bought. My boyfriend and I have decided to go to the courthouse. It’s what is right for us. Neither of us have a lot of money, but we know that we want to spend the rests of our lives together. We have talked about marriage in length. Starting a life together is more important to us than spending money on things that I’ll probably forget about in a week anyways. My memory is horrible. Not to say that having a big fancy wedding is bad, it’s just not something we want.
Talking to friends and co-workes about life updates and casually mentioning the upcoming nuptials the first question they ask is “did he propose?” No he hasn’t and I am fine with that. The thing that is more frustrating is the look I get once I tell them he hasn’t. We aren’t choosing to get married on whim. Even deciding to date was very thought out because we both come with a boat load of bagged. Yes it’s nice to be proposed to, but at the end of the day I know that I am loved more than I ever thought was possible. One big special moment doesn’t compare to all the tiny ways my boyfriend has shown me love over the last year and a half and all the tiny ways he will show me he loves me for the rest of our lives.
For some people they need the big romantic gesture, the big proposal, the big ring, the big wedding. These are not inherently bad things, they just aren’t what everyone needs.
I’m getting married in like two weeks, in a courthouse, to the man that I love. I regret nothing. Our relationship has been done the way I do everything else in my life and that’s to the beat of my own drum. So when someone tells you they’re getting married and there wasn’t this grand proposal, don’t feel bad for them. Congratulate them and be excited for them! That’s all I want. I made the choice with my boyfriend to do things the way we are doing them. We love each other and know that we want to build a life together, the good, the bad, and the ugly, that comes along with it and we can’t be more excited.